Community

An old teacher of mine – a friend, really – once reminisced on a job interview he had at a new school. And he remembers feeling this: that what made this particular school special was that he had an overwhelming sense that this would be a wonderful place to experience a tragedy.

It’s an odd notion to have during a first impression, maybe, but it’s an important feeling to have. Oftentimes it might be a school, or a church, or a workplace. But let me say this: it is also a wonderful thing to experience that feeling in a person.

I see a lot of tragedy at work. And I see a lot of different family dynamics take on that tragedy. I see people dying in the most dignified way, with their families and loved ones all around. And I see people dying who desperately want to keep fighting, and keep living. And I see people dye alone, without anyone there to love them except some doctors and nurses.

I often think – what will my death look like? Who will be there? I’m sure plenty of folks will stop by or be sad for a bit – but who will really be there with me? Holding my hand, and tying to make me happy, even at the last? And who wants me to be there at her death? Who really wants me there, offering my love, and my support? Anyone?

For a combination of reasons, I slept well last night. And I slept on my left, of all things, and even woke up that way. And today, for the first time in a long time, I felt just a little bit like myself.